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Explanation of first initial “N.” in name N. Stephan Kinsella

Although I was born Farrell Wayne Doiron (before being adopted), my name ever since has been Norman Stephan Kinsella. “Norman” after my father Norman Joseph Kinsella (his own name taken from his aunt, Norma Gravois, and father, Peter Joseph Kinsella); “Stephan”–I don’t know, my mom, a WASP from rural Louisiana–no connection to Russia or Hungary–just liked it.

Some feel the use of a first initial pretentious, akin to the use of “Winthrop, III” surname. In the category of “if you haven’t walked in his moccassins…,” understand that we middle-namers by and large do not choose to go by the middle as opposed to first name (except for my erstwhile friend Christopher Scott Mengis, who went by Chris until he moved to Forth Worth to take a job as an engineer with General Dynamics, then switched, confusingly and annoyingly, to Scott, or maybe I have it backwards; but then his recommendation of Dire Straits’ Love Over Gold as a “great” album was, really, enough to sever the ties). And, due to the absolute illiteracy of most Americans today, as witnessed by the eternal recurring nightmare of people misspelling and mispronouncing my name as “Stephen” or “Steven,” if we don’t put the preceding initial then the morons will inevitably enter it incorrectly on their little Rite-Aid or Continental Air or whatever computer terminals, causing all sorts of mayhem and confusion later (not necessarily a bad thing for an anarchist, I admit).

Therefore, the inclusion of “N.” before “Stephan” on occasion, not for pretension (for that, I’d add a “III” or “Winthrop” or “Fitz-“something), but as a signal to the idiots out there in a futile attempt to try to slightly reduce the number of name screwups they perpetrate.

Tips for parents when naming kids:

  • Select a name you will call your kid that is easy to pronounce and spell (i.e., “Steven” instead of “Stephen”; and “Stefan” instead of “Stephan” [but I love you Mom!]);
  • Don’t ever intentionally pick a name that has to be abbreviated, like James to Jim; or an even stupider abbreviation like John to “Jack” (how does that one happen?);
  • Never hyphenate your own last name or, God forbid, that of your kids (no offense, Tony);
  • Select a name that is not weird, too ethnic (“La-” or “Sha-“anything), or 60s-ish (“Melody” or “Charity” or “Sunshine”); and
  • Make that name be the kid’s first name.

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